Welcome The Nineties, BABY!!!!
Well, i never thought it would come to this but here i am. i’ve joined the wave of the future, i’ve joined the blog-o-sphere, i’ve gotten with the times, i’ve started living in the now, i’ve started drinking vitamin water and wearing american apparell every day and i’ve started using words like blog-o-sphere. what the heck happened ?
Usually i chose/try to bury my head in the sand when it comes to “what’s going on”. I wait til movies are on dvd and my favourite tv and music was made about 10 years ago. I like to enjoy things at my own time. needless to say doing something this “modern” and “contemporary” is a big stretch for me, but i figured if i can grasp making microwave popcorn, i can probably grasp this too.
Now from what i understand a blog is a place for people to “vent” and “share their unique and important opinions on the big issues” so please allow me to do so…
oh, also please don’t judge me on my poor grammar and writing ability. i promise you, i am a pretty sharp guy in real life.
1. Carrier Pidgeons
I saw someone using one of these in a movie preview a while ago and it floored me. i can’t believe that at one point in time you could give a note to a pidgeon, an animal with a brain the size of a pencil eraser and say “dennis, (that’s what i’d call mine) please take this note to my wives, they need to know that i will not be home to sup tonight as i will be toiling in the salt mines til morn” and the bird would comply. how amazing is this!? If i wasn’t terrified of birds and hadn’t just purchased a new cell phone i would gladly use one of these amazing creatures to keep up with the people i care about.
2. Biblical Names…
parent’s should stop naming their kids after the most popular people in the bible…(simon, mary, matthew, john, luke, mark, wayne, david, thomas, brent, joseph etc.)everyone has these names, if you’re expecting and planning on using a biblical name, please dig a little deeper. it’s a pretty huge book, and at the least can help you find unique baby names.
I guess what i’m saying is…i just really want to meet someone who’s parents hated them enough to name them barabas. I’m sure they’re out there and i’m sure their awful name forced them to be very kind people. Barabas, if you’re reading this…you got a friend in me.
3. Nintendo Wii
About a week ago i was playing Wii baseball with my pal taylor, naturally i was getting my ass kicked. I’m batting in the top of the 7th inning, i swing at a curveball (missing it completely) and pop my shoulder out of it’s socket. Before i knew it I was on the floor wincing in pain and trying my best to not black out and cry like the giant pussy willow i am. Its sounds silly, but this was probably the most painful experience of my life. My father is a man with scars on his face from hockey pucks and baseballs flying at it, reading this would probably make him cry (on the inside of course) as the wii incident is my only sports injury ever.
This experience made do some thinking…
-if this is how people in my generation are getting hurt, we’re totally effed when world war three goes down…especially if the “bad men” invade and challenge us to a game of “american baseball”.NOW THERE’S A MOVIE I WOULD WATCH!
-My respect for the olympic athlete that impaled his scrotum on the pole vault went way up after this experience. I used to laugh at him, now i feel for him and want to send him a cheque.
Scrotum guy, if you’re out there…you got a friend in me.
